No, I can’t say that I will want her ashes back. There doesn’t seem to be a point. I do wish I could see her one last time to comfort her and say goodbye, but that isn’t an option here in this case. Agreed, this is heartbreaking, but then her whole life was rather heartbreaking. She was a beautiful dog who was never comfortable in her own body. Avoidance seemed the only motivation she really understood, and that made her virtually impossible to train. What people mistook for fine training was really just her desire to avoid problems. Following me around and coming when summoned were about all she learned here. I am not even certain if she actually loved me or just saw me as a source of security. Some irony there, eh?
Honestly, what she was asked to do yesterday seemed consistent with fairly recent errands, but clearly something made it much harder for her. I only wish I could be with her to ease her final hours and assure her she’s not in trouble. If anything, all her troubles are behind her now.